God doth work, who shall hinder it ? and this I knew experimentally. My desires after the Lord grew stronger, and zeal in the pure knowledge of God, and of Christ alone, without the help of any man, book, or writing. For though I read the Scriptures that spoke of Christ and of God; yet I knew Him not, but by revelation, as He who hath the key did open, and as the Father of Life drew me to his Son by his Spirit. Then the Lord gently led me along, and let me see his love, which was endless and eternal, surpassing all the knowledge that men have in the natural state, or can obtain from history or books; and that love let me see myself, as I was without him. I was afraid of all company, for I saw them perfectly where they were, through the love of God, which let me see myself. I had not fellowship with any people, priests or professors, or any sort of separated people, but with Christ, who hath the key, and opened the door of Light and Life unto me. I was afraid of all carnal talk and talkers, for I could see nothing but corruptions, and the life lay under the burthen of corrup tions. When I myself was in the deep, shut up under all, I could not believe that I should ever overcome; my troubles, my sorrows, and my temptations were so great, that I thought many times I should have despaired, I was so tempted. But when Christ opened to me, how He was tempted by the same devil, and overcame him and bruised his head, and that through him and his power, light, grace, and Spirit, I should overcome also, I had confidence in him; so He it was that opened to me, when I was shut up, and had no hope nor faith. Christ, who had enlightened me, gave me his light to believe in; he gave me hope, which he himself revealed in me, and he gave me his Spirit and grace, which I found sufficient in the deeps and in weakness. Thus, in the deepest miseries, and in the greatest sorrows and temptations, that many times beset me, the Lord in his mercy did keep me. I found that there were two thirsts in me; the one after the creatures, to get help and strength there; and the other after the Lord, the Creator, and his Son Jesus Christ. I saw all the world could do me no good; if I had had a king's diet, palace, and attendance, all would have been as nothing; for nothing gave me comfort, but the Lord by his power. I saw professors, priests, and people, were whole and at ease in that condition which was my misery; and they loved that which I would have been rid of. But the Lord stayed my desires upon himself, from whom came my help, and my care was cast upon him alone. Therefore, all wait patiently upon the Lord, whatsoever condition you be in; wait in the grace and truth that came by Jesus: for if ye so do, there is a promise to you, and the Lord God will fulfil it in you. Blessed are all they that do indeed hunger and thirst after righteousness, they shall be satisfied with it. I have found it so, praised be the Lord who filleth with it, and satisfieth the desires of the hungry soul. O let the house of the spiritual Israel say, "His mercy endureth for ever!" It is the great love of God to make a wilderness of that which is pleasant to the outward eye and fleshly mind; and to make a fruitful field of a barren wilderness. This is the great work of God. But while people's minds run in the earthly, after the creatures and changeable things, changeable ways and religions, and changeable, uncertain teachers, their minds are in bondage, they are changeable, tossed up and down with windy doctrines and thoughts, and notions and things; their minds being out of the unchangeable truth in the inward parts, the Light of Jesus Christ, which would keep them to the unchangeable. He is the way to the Father; and in all my troubles he preserved me by his Spirit and power; praised be his holy name for ever! Again, I heard a voice which said, "Thou serpent! thou dost seek to destroy the life, but canst not; for the sword which keepeth the tree of life, shall destroy thee." So Christ, the Word of God, that bruised the head of the serpent, the destroyer, preserved me; my inward mind being joined to his good Seed, that bruised the head of this serpent, the destroyer. This inward life sprung up in me, to answer all the opposing professors and priests, and brought Scriptures to my memory to refute them with. At another time, I saw the great love of God, and I was filled with admiration at the infinitude of it; I saw what was cast out from God, and what entered into God's kingdom; and how by Jesus, the opener of the door, with his heavenly key, the entrance was given; and I saw death, how it had passed upon all men, and oppressed the seed of God in man, and in me; and how I in the seed came forth, and what the promise was to. Yet it was so with me, that there seemed to be two pleading in me; questionings arose in my mind about gifts and prophecies; and I was tempted again to despair, as if I had sinned against the Holy Ghost. I was in great perplexity and trouble for many days; yet I gave up myself to the Lord still. One day when I had been walking solitarily abroad, and was come home, I was wrapped up in the love of God, so that I could not but admire the greatness of his love. While I was in that condition, it was opened unto me by the eternal light and power, and I saw clearly therein, "that all was done, and to be done, in and by Christ; and how he conquers and destroys this tempter, the Devil, and all his works, and is above him; and that all these troubles were good for me, and temptations for the trial of my faith, which Christ had given me." The Lord opened me, that I saw through all these troubles and temptations; my living faith was raised, that I saw all was done by Christ, the life, and my belief was in Him. When at any time my condition was veiled, my secret belief was stayed firm, and hope underneath held me, as an anchor in the bottom of the sea, and anchored my immortal soul to its Bishop, causing it to swim above the sea, the world, where all the raging waves, foul weather, tempests, and temptations are. But, O! then did I see my tro. les, trials, and temptations, more clearly than ever I had done. As the light appeared, all appeared that is out of the light; darkness, death, temptations, the unrighteous, the ungodly; all was manifest and seen in the light. After this, a pure fire appeared in me; then I saw how he sat as a refiner's fire and as fullers' soap; then the spiritual discerning came into me, by which I did discern my own thoughts, groans, and sighs; and what it was that veiled me, and what it was that opened me. That which could not abide in the patience, nor endure the fire, in the light I found it to be the groans of the flesh, that could not give up to the will of God; which had so veiled me, that I could not be patient in all trials, troubles, and perplexities ;could not give up self to die by the cross, the power of God, that the - living and quickened might follow him; and that that which would cloud and veil from the presence of Christ-that which the sword of the Spirit cuts down, and which must die, might not be kept alive. I discerned also the groans of the Spirit, which opened me, and made intercession to God; in which Spirit is the true waiting upon God, for the redemption of the body and of the whole creation. By this Spirit, in which the true sighing is, I saw over the false sighings and groanings. By this invisible Spirit I discerned all the false hearing, the false seeing, and the false smelling which was above the Spirit, quenching and grieving it; and that all they that were there, were in confusion and deceit, where the false asking and praying is, in deceit, in that nature and tongue that takes God's holy name in vain, wallows in the Egyptian sea, and asketh, but hath not; for they hate his light and resist the Holy Ghost; turn grace into wantonness, and rebel against the Spirit; and are erred from the faith they should ask in, and from the Spirit they should pray by. He that knoweth these things in the true Spirit, can witness them. The divine light of Christ manifesteth all things; the spiritual fire trieth all things, and severeth all things. Several things did I then see as the Lord opened them to me; for he showed me that which can live in his holy refining fire, and that can live to God under his law. He made me sensible how the law and the prophets were until John; and how the least in the everlasting kingdom of God is greater than John. The pure and perfect law of God is over the flesh, to keep it and its works, which are not perfect, under, by the perfect law; and the law of God that is perfect, answers the perfect principle of God in every one. This law the Jews, and the prophets, and John were to perform and do. None know the giver of this law but by the Spirit of God; neither can any truly read it, or hear its voice, but by the Spirit of God; he that can receive it, let him. John, who was the greatest prophet that was born of a woman, did bear witness to the light, which Christ, the great heavenly prophet, hath enlightened every man that cometh into the world withal; that they might believe in it, and become the children of light, and so have the light of life, and not come into condemnation. For the true belief stands in the light that condemns all evil, and the Devil, who is the prince of darkness, and would draw out of the light into condemnation. They that walk in this light, come to the mountain of the house of God, established above all mountains, and to God's teaching, who will teach them his ways. These things were opened to me in the light. I saw also the mountains burning up; and the rubbish, the rough and crooked ways and places, made smooth and plain, that the Lord might come into his tabernacle. These things are to be found in man's heart. But to speak of these things being within, seemed strange to the rough, and crooked, and mountainous ones. Yet the Lord saith, "O Earth, hear the word of the Lord!" The law of the Spirit crosseth the fleshly mind, spirit, and will, which lives in disobedience, and doth not keep within the law of the Spirit. I saw this law was the pure love of God, which was upon me, and which I must go through though I was troubled while I was under it; for I could not be dead to the law, but through the law which did judge and condemn that, which is to be condemned. I saw many talked of the law, who had never known the law to be their schoolmaster; and many talked of the gospel of Christ, who had never known life and immortality brought to light in them by it. You that have been under that schoolmaster, and the condemnation of it, know these things; for though the Lord in that day opened these things unto me in secret, they have since been published by his eternal Spirit, as on the house top. And as you are brought into the law, and through the law to be dead to it, and witness the righteousness of the law fulfilled in you, ye will afterwards come to know what it is to be brought into the faith, and through faith from under the law; and abiding in the faith, which Christ is the author of, ye will have peace and access to God. But if ye look out from the faith, and from that which would keep you in the victory, and look after fleshly things or words, ye will be brought into bondage to flesh again, and to the law, which takes hold upon the flesh and sin, and worketh wrath, and the works of the flesh will appear again. The law of God takes hold upon the law of sin and death; but the law of faith, or the law of the Spirit of life, which is the love of God, and which comes by Jesus (who is the end of the law for righteousness' sake), makes free from the law of sin and death. This law of life fleshly-minded men do not know; yet they will tempt you, to draw you from the Spirit into the flesh, and so into bondage. Therefore ye, who know the love of God, and the law of his Spirit, and the freedom that is in Jesus Christ, stand fast in him, in that divine faith which he is the author of in you; and be not entangled with the yoke of bondage. For the ministry of Christ Jesus, and his teaching, bring into liberty and freedom; but the ministry that is of man, and by man, and which stands in the will of man, bringeth into bondage, and under the shadow of death and darkness. Therefore none can be ministers of Christ Jesus but in the eternal Spirit, which was before the Scriptures were given forth; for if they have not his Spirit, they are none of his. Though they may have his light to condemn them that hate it, yet they can never bring any into unity and fellowship in the Spirit, except they be in it; for the Seed of God is a burthensome stone to the selfish, fleshly, earthly will, which reigns in its own knowledge and understanding that must perish, and in its wisdom that is devilish. And the Spirit of God is grieved, and vexed, and quenched with that which brings into the fleshly bondage; and that which wars against the Spirit of God, must be mortified by it; for the flesh lusteth against the Spirit, and the Spirit against the flesh; and these are contrary the one to the other. The flesh would have its liberty, and the Spirit would have its liberty; but the Spirit is to have its liberty and not the flesh. If therefore ye quench the Spirit, and join to the flesh, and be servants of it, then ye are judged and tormented by the Spirit; but if ye join to the Spirit and serve God in it, ye have liberty and victory over the flesh and its works. Therefore keep in the daily cross, the power of God, by which ye may witness all that to be crucified which is contrary to the will of God, and which shall not come into his kingdom. These things are here mentioned and opened for information, exhortation, and comfort to others, as the Lord opened them unto me in that day. In that day I wondered that the children of Israel should murmur for water and victuals, But for I could have fasted long without murmuring or minding victuals. I was judged at other times, that I was not contented to be sometimes without the water and bread of life, that I might learn to know how to want, and how to abound. I heard of a woman in LANCASHIRE, that had fasted two and twenty days, and I travelled to see her; but when I came to her I saw that she was under a temptation. When I had spoken to her what I had from the Lord, I left her, her father being one high in profession. Passing on, I went among the professors at DUCKINGFIELD and MANCHESTER, where I stayed a while, and declared truth among them. There were some convinced, who received the Lord's teaching, by which they were confirmed and stood in the truth. But the professors were in a rage, all pleading for sin and imperfection, and could not endure to hear talk of perfection, and of a holy and sinless life. But the Lord's power was over all; though they were chained under darkness and sin, which they pleaded for, and quenched the tender thing in them. About this time there was a great meeting of the Baptists, at BROUGHTON, in Leicestershire, with some that had separated from them; and people of other notions went thither, and I went also. Not many of the Baptists came, but many others were there. The Lord opened my mouth, and the everlasting truth was declared amongst them, and the power of the Lord was over them all. For in that day the Lord's power began to spring, and I had great openings in the Scriptures. Several were convinced in those parts, and were turned from darkness to light, from the power of Satan unto God; and many were raised up to praise God. When I reasoned with professors and other people, some became convinced. I was still under great temptations sometimes, and my inward sufferings were heavy; but I could find none to open my condition to but the Lord alone, unto whom I cried night and day. I went back into NOTTINGHAMSHIRE, and there the Lord showed me that the natures of those things, which were hurtful without, were within, in the hearts and minds of wicked men. The natures of dogs, swine, vipers, of Sodom and Egypt, Pharaoh, Cain, Ishmael, Esau, &c.; the natures of these I saw within, though people had been looking without. I cried to the Lord, saying, "Why should I be thus, seeing I was never addicted to commit those evils?" and the Lord answered, "That it was needful I should have a sense of all conditions, how else should I speak to all conditions!" and in this I saw the infinite love of God. I saw also, that there was an ocean of darkness and death; but an infinite ocean of light and love, which flowed over the ocean of darkness. In that also I saw the infinite love of God, and I had great openings. And as I was walking by the steeple-house,* in MANSFIELD, *The term "steeple-house" occurs not unfrequently in this Journal, and in the early writings and records of Friends. Though it may sound harsh, and appear to savour of the scurrility and intolerance of that zealous age, yet this, or any other mode of speech adopted by Friends, was by no means taken up for the purpose of opprobrium, but rather significantly to discover the little veneration or distinction they could show for these buildings more than others; believing that the Almighty is equally present |