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On Monday, September 30, 1771, will be published,
(To be continued Monthly)
A NEW WORK, ENTITLED
THE CANDID REVIEW,
A FAIR AND IMPARTIAL ACCOUNT OF ALL WORKS OF DIVINITY
BY A SOCIETY OF JEWS.
The Editors of this work hope for a preference to other periodical publishers on the following considerations.
1. As they belong to no party of men who call themselves Christians, neither to the Socinians, Arians, Quakers, nor Cameronians, they are less interested against the doctrines of the established church, than those who have some private system to contend for. They are sensible that the scheme of establishing Judaism in England would be absurd and desperate ; therefore they shall make no advances toward it, but suffer the evidences of the Christian doctrines to stand as they are represented in the works of the learned.
2. As no Jew is in any danger of being called upon to subscribe the articles of the Church of England, no invidious remarks need be expected against that article of the present discipline. If the reasonings of any writer on the side of the church should be unanswerable, and the objections of the other part weak
and frivolous, their language insolent and clamorous, this is nothing to us; and therefore we shall have no temptation to depart from our impartiality.
3. As we shall never use any Christian liturgy, we shall not think it necessary to extol such pamphlets as recommend alterations in the Liturgy of the Church of England.
4. As we are known to be very sincere believers of the Old Testament, there will be no reason to suspect us of recommending Deism in opposition to Moses and the prophets.
We might insist on many other advantages, which fairly intitle us to the first place in the esteem of the public: but we think these are sufficient to recommend our projected Review to all such readers as have any concern for the interest of Revelation in general, and the faith of the Church of England in particular.
THE MORAL CHARACTER
A GENTLEMAN, whose premises were infested by a large breed of sparrows, said they were birds of no principle. Of all monkies it may be said, with much more propriety, that they are beasts of no principle; for they have every evil quality, and not one good one. They are saucy and insolent; always making an attempt to bully and terrify people; and biting those first who are most afraid of them. An impertinent curiosity runs through all their actions. They never can let things alone, but must know what is going forward. If a pot or a kettle is set upon the fire, and the cook turns her back, the monkey whips off the cover to see what she has put into it; even though he cannot get at it without setting his feet upon
the hot bars of the grate.
Mimickry is another of the monkey's qualities. Whatever he sees men do, he must affect to do the like himself. He seems to have no rule of his own, and so is ruled by the actions of men or beasts; as weak people follow the fashion of the world, whether it be good or bad.
With regard to its offspring, the monkey hath little more than the foolish part of parental affection. The mother often dandles her young one till she has stifled
it, or wearied it out of its life; and holds out her ugly brat for every body to see and admire it; as if, for its beauty, it were the wonder of the animal creation.
No monkey has any sense of gratitude, (ingratum qui dixerit, omnia dixit,) but takes his victuals with a snatch, and then grins in the face of the person that gives it him, lest he should take it away again: for he supposes that all men will snatch away what they can lay hold of, as all monkies do.
Through an invincible selfishness, no monkey considers any individual but himself, as the poor cat found to her cost, when the monkey burned her paws with raking his chesnuts out of the fire. They can never eat together without quarrelling and plundering one another. As the Poet said of mankind in the state of nature-vivitur ex rapto--so are all Monkies possessed by a spirit of rapine : and are as cunning in contriving a theft, as they are nimble and dexterous in the performance.
Every monkey delights in mischief, and cannot help doing it when it is in his power. If any thing he takes hold of can be broken or spoiled, he is sure to find the way of doing it: and he chatters with pleasure when he hears the noise of a China vessel smashed to pieces upon the pavement. If he takes up a bottle of ink, he empties it upon the floor. He turns your sand-box upside down, or sifts it into the ink-horn. He unfolds all your papers, and scatters them about the room; and what he cannot undo he tears to pieces : and it is wonderful to see how much of this work he will do in a few minutes when he happens to get loose.
Though a monkey has never been considered as a fit subject for a Biographer, yet tradition has preserved the history of some of their exploits, which are curious
and characteristic: but the event is generally unfortunate. Every body has heard of the monkey, whose curiosity led him to the mouth of a cannon to see how it went off; when he paid for his peeping with the loss of his head. In a ship where a relation of mine was an officer, while the men were busy in fetching powder from below,and making cartridges, a monkey on board took up a lighted candle, and ran down to the powderroom to see what they were about: but was happily overtaken just as he got to the lanthorn, and thrown out at the nearest port-hole into the sea with the lighted candle in his hand. Another lost his life by the spirit of mimickry. He had seen his master shaving his own face: and at the first opportunity took up the razor to shave himself, and made shift to cut his throat.
When the wild monkies have escaped to the top of the trees, the people below who want to catch them shew them the use of gloves, by putting them on and pulling them off repeatedly; and when the monkies are supposed to have taken the hint, they leave plenty of gloves upon the ground, having first lined them with pitch. The monkies come down, put on the gloves, but cannot pull them off again; and when they are surprised and betake themselves to the trees as usual, they slide backwards upon their hams and are taken.
A monkey who had seen his mistress upon her pillow in a night-cap, which at her rising she pulled off and hung upon a chair, puts on the cap, lays his head upon the pillow, and by personating the lady made himself ten times more frightful and ridiculous; as awkward people do, when they ape their superiors, and affect a fashion which is above their sphere.
Another ran away with a basket of live partridges, and when he was pursued, escaped to the top of the house; where he managed the lid of the basket in such