Joe Miller's Jests: With Copious Additions |
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Page 5
... turned him off . Upon his wits , said the other . That is living upon a slender stock indeed , replied the first . 31. A country parson having divided his text under two and twenty heads , one of the congregation went out of the church ...
... turned him off . Upon his wits , said the other . That is living upon a slender stock indeed , replied the first . 31. A country parson having divided his text under two and twenty heads , one of the congregation went out of the church ...
Page 13
... turned it ; being thus caught in the fact , and having nothing to say for themselves , his worship committed them both to jail without bail or mainprize . 77. The late facetious Mr. Spiller , being at the rehearsal , on a Saturday ...
... turned it ; being thus caught in the fact , and having nothing to say for themselves , his worship committed them both to jail without bail or mainprize . 77. The late facetious Mr. Spiller , being at the rehearsal , on a Saturday ...
Page 16
... turning a little pale , Lord , sir , said he , I hope there is no danger ? Yes , indeed , is there , answered the surgeon , for if the fellow don't set up a good pair of heels , the wound will heal before he returns . 93. Not many years ...
... turning a little pale , Lord , sir , said he , I hope there is no danger ? Yes , indeed , is there , answered the surgeon , for if the fellow don't set up a good pair of heels , the wound will heal before he returns . 93. Not many years ...
Page 18
... turned all his estate into obligations - meaning he had sold and mortgaged his patri- mony to make presents to other men . 104. An Englishman and a Welchman disputing in whose country was the best living ; said the Welchman , There is ...
... turned all his estate into obligations - meaning he had sold and mortgaged his patri- mony to make presents to other men . 104. An Englishman and a Welchman disputing in whose country was the best living ; said the Welchman , There is ...
Page 27
... turned off first , without speak- ing one word ; the other mounting the ladder , began to harangue the crowd , whose ears were attentively open to hear him , expecting some confession from him . Good people , says he , my brother hangs ...
... turned off first , without speak- ing one word ; the other mounting the ladder , began to harangue the crowd , whose ears were attentively open to hear him , expecting some confession from him . Good people , says he , my brother hangs ...
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Common terms and phrases
answered Arrah asked begged Ben Jonson better bishop brought called captain church clergyman coming countryman court Covent Garden cried Daniel Purcell Dean Swift dear Derrick dinner doctor door Dublin Duke Duncote exclaimed eyes father fellow fool French gave gentleman George Selwyn give grace guinea hanged head hear heard Heidigger Hibernian highwayman honest honour horse humour husband Irish Irishman JOE MILLER'S JESTS king lady late laugh link-boy live London look looking-glass lord Lord Chancellor Bacon lordship madam majesty married master morning never night nobleman observed officer once passing person poet poor pray Prithee Queen replied returned sent servant shillings Sire speak street sure tavern tell thee thing thou thought told took town turned Tyburn walking wife woman young Zounds
Popular passages
Page 220 - THREE Poets, in three distant ages born, Greece, Italy, and England did adorn. The first in loftiness of thought surpassed; The next in majesty •, In both the last. The force of Nature could no further go ; To make a third, she joined the former two.
Page 233 - When Lesbia first I saw, so heavenly fair, With eyes so bright and with that awful air, I thought my heart which durst so high aspire As bold, as his who snatched celestial fire. But soon as e'er the beauteous idiot spoke, Forth from her coral lips such folly broke : Like balm the trickling nonsense heal'd my wound, And what her eyes enthralled, her tongue unbound.
Page 236 - ON THE COUNTESS OF PEMBROKE UNDERNEATH this sable hearse Lies the subject of all verse: Sidney's sister, Pembroke's mother: Death, ere thou hast slain another Fair, and learned, and good as she, Time shall throw a dart at thee.
Page 218 - My sledge and hammer lie reclined, My bellows, too, have lost their wind ; My fire's extinct, my forge decayed, And in the dust my vice is laid. My coal is spent, my iron's gone, My nails are drove, my work is done ; My fire-dried corpse lies here at rest, And, smoke-like, soars up to be bless'd.
Page 218 - Thy reliques, Rowe, to this fair urn we trust, And sacred, place by Dryden's awful dust; Beneath a rude and nameless stone he lies, , To which thy tomb shall guide inquiring eyes. . '• ' Peace to thy gentle shade, and endless rest! Blest in thy genius, in thy love too blest ! One grateful woman to thy fame supplies What a whole thankless land to his denies.
Page 220 - Flavia the least and slightest toy Can with resistless art employ. This Fan in meaner hands would prove An engine of small force in love ; But she, with such an air and mien, Not to be told or safely seen, Directs its wanton motions so, That it wounds more than Cupid's bow ; Gives coolness to the matchless dame, To every other breast a flame.
Page 242 - Obey has said, And man by law supreme has made, Then all that's kind is laid aside, And nothing left but state and pride. Fierce as an eastern prince he grows, *•" And all his innate rigour shows: Then but to look, to laugh, or speak, Will the nuptial contract break.
Page 247 - Did MILTON'S PROSE, O CHARLES! thy death defend? A furious foe, unconscious, proves a friend ; On MILTON'S VERSE does BENTLEY comment? know, A weak officious friend becomes a foe. While he would seem his author's fame to further, The MURDEROUS CRITIC has aveng'd THY MURDER.
Page 109 - Agh! my lady; success to your ladyship, and success to your honour's honour, this morning, of all days in the year; for sure didn't I dream last night that her ladyship gave me a pound of tea, and that your honour gave me a pound of tobacco?" "But, my good woman," said the general, "do not you know that dreams always go by the rule of contrary?