DCLXVI. April 1, 1805. The Son of thy vows to his Mother in faith and hope sendeth greeting. A JOURNEY into the country, much busi 66 ness, with a heart backward and reluctant to all good, are the causes of my long silence. My son," says God, "give me thy heart." I believe he has got it, for I can do nothing with it; and, according to my feelings, he only moves it by fits and starts, and without him we can do nothing. To will is always present with me, but to perform is not. I often purpose, but my purposes are broken off. And does this stand for nothing? O no. "If there be first a willing mind, it is accepted." God's power makes us willing; and “whosoever will, let him come and take the water of life freely." But suppose, after long seeking and begging, I succeed nothow then? why this aggravates the appetite, makes it more keen, and we get more and more sensible of our beggary and neediness, cry and beg, till all our strength is gone, and nothing appears but an expectation of perishing for ever. He is to appear and give strength to them that have no might; they are to come to the feast that were ready to perish, for "the needy shall not always be forgotten; the expectation of the poor shall not perish for ever." You see I labour to build up, and the devil and my poor old mother labour jointly to pull down. Nevertheless, though thou canst not go forth in the dances of them that make merry, yet thou art not altogether without thy tabrets and ornaments. There is some little love between you and me, and at times much self-abasement. There is a real regard to the truth in the power of it; at times some meekness and submission; some hungerings and thirstings, and holy longings; some cries, tears, hopes and expectations; and some very high and worthy conceptions of the suitableness and preciousness of the Son of God: or else why such an earnest desire after an interest in his love, grace, and great salvation? We must not despise the day of small things. God will not quicken us to feel our wants, vain. He never said to any under such an experience, “Seek ye my face in vain.” “They shall not be ashamed that wait for me." God is faithful; therefore hope thou in him. Farewell. My love to Becky, the son and daughter. Ever yours, W. H. S.S. cry and beg, till all our strength is gone, and nothing appears but an expectation of perishing for ever. He is to appear and give strength to them that have no might; they are to come to the feast that were ready to perish, for "the needy shall not always be forgotten; the expectation of the poor shall not perish for ever." You see I labour to build up, and the devil and my poor old mother labour jointly to pull down. Nevertheless, though thou canst not go forth in the dances of them that make merry, yet thou art not altogether without thy tabrets and ornaments. There is some little love between you and me, and at times much self-abasement. There is a real regard to the truth in the power of it; at times some meekness and submission; some hungerings and thirstings, and holy longings; some cries, tears, hopes and expectations; and some very high and worthy conceptions of the suitableness and preciousness of the Son of God: or else why such an earnest desire after an interest in his love, grace, and great salvation? We must not despise the day of small things. God will not quicken us to feel our wants, |
