Page images
PDF
EPUB

the power to enjoy, had not the prudence to acquire; and when they had the prudence to acquire, had no longer the power to enjoy.

LXXXII.

THERE are some who write, talk and think so much about vice and virtue, that they have no time to practise either the one or the other*. They die with less sin to answer for than some others, because they have been too busy in disputing about the origin of it, to commit it; and with little or no religion of their own, from their constant though unavailing assiduities to settle that of other men. Charles the Fourth, after his abdication, amused himself in his retirement at St. Juste, by attempting to make a number of watches go exactly together. Being constantly foiled in this attempt, he exclaimed, "What a fool have I been, to neglect my own concerns, and to waste my whole life in a vain attempt to make all men think alike, on matters of religion, when I cannot even make a few watches keep time together;

"His vellem potius nugis tota ista dedisset
"Tempora sævitiæ."

LXXXIII.

ADROIT observers will find, that some who affect to dislike flattery, may yet be flattered indirectly, by a well seasoned abuse and ridicule of their rivals. Diogenes professed to be no flatterer; but his cynic raillery was, in other words, flattery; it fed the ruling passion of the Athenian mob, who were more pleased to hear their superiors abused, than themselves commended.

The great Howard, on the contrary, was so fully engaged in works of active benevolence, that, unlike Baxter, whose knees were calcined by prayer, he left himself but little time to pray. Thousands were praying for him!

LXXXIV

A COOL blooded and crafty politician, when he would be thoroughly revenged on his enemy, makes the injuries which have been inflicted, not on himself, but on others, the pretext of his attack. He thus engages the world as a partizan in his quarrel, and dignifies his private hate, by giving it the air of disinterested resentment. When Augustus wished to put in force the Lex læsæ majestatis, for suppressing libels and lampoons, he took care to do it, says Aurelius, not in his own name, but in the name of the majesty of the Roman people. "Nam suo nomine compescere

erat invidiosum, sub ALIENO facile, et utile. Ergo specie legis tractabat quasi majestas populi Romani infamaretur."

LXXXV.

PETTIFOGGERS in law, and empyrics in medicine, whether their patients lose or save their property, or their lives, take care to be, in either case, equally remunerated; they profit by both horns of the dilemma, and press defeat no less than success, into their service. They hold, from time immemorial, the fee-simple of a vast estate, subject to no alienation, diminution, revolution, nor tax; the folly and ignorance of mankind. Over this extensive domain, they have long had, by undisputed usance, the sole management and control, in as much as the real owners most strenuously and sturdily disclaim all right, title, and proprietorship therein.

LXXXVI.

SOME Sciolists have discovered a short path to celebrity. Having heard that it is a vastly silly thing to believe every thing, they take it for granted, that it must be a vastly wise thing, to believe nothing. They therefore set up

See a note in Hypocrisy for a curious anecdote of Kien Long, Emperor of China, and his physicians, related to me as authentic by my uncle, the late Sir George Staunton.

for free thinkers; but their only stock in trade is, that they are free from thinking. It is not safe to contemn them, nor very easy to convince them; since no persons make so large a demand upon the reason of others, as those who have none of their own; as a highwayman will take greater liberties with our purse, than our banker.

LXXXVII.

THE pope conducts himself towards our heavenly master, as a knavish steward does to an earthly one. He says to the tenants, you may continue to neglect my master's interests as much as you please, but keep on good terms with me, and I will take care that you shall be on good terms with my master *.

LXXXVIII.

WHEN the great Frederic, the enlightened philosopher of Sans Souci, heard of the petitions and remonstrances sent to the throne from our towns and counties, he was heard to exclaim, "Ah, why am not I their king? with an hundred thousand of my troops round the throne, and a score or two of executioners in my train, I should soon make those proud islanders as dutiful as they are brave, and myself the first monarch of the universe." But it would have been only by and with a parliament that he could have raised any supplies; and Charles the First might have taught him the danger of attempting to reign without one. dred thousand men would have mutinied for want of pay, or, if he had attempted to support them by unconstitutional measures, his executioners might eventually have been called upon to perform a tragedy in which this adventurous monarch himself might have been under the awkward necessity of performing the principal part.

Either his hun

In the book of Religious Rates, registered in the court of France, in the year 1699, are the following items: Absolution for apostacy, 80 livres; for bigamy, 10,050; ditto for homicide, 95; dispensation for a great irregularity, 50 livres; dispensation from vows of chastity, 15.

LXXXIX.

THERE are a vast number of easy, pliable, goodnatured human expletives in the world, who are just what that world chuses to make them; they glitter without pride, and are affable without humility; they sin without enjoyment, and pray without devotion; they are charitable, not to benefit the poor, but to court the rich; profligate without passion, they are debauchees to please others, and to punish themselves. Thus, a youth without fire, is followed by an old age without experience, and they continue to float down the tide of time, as circumstances or chance may dictate, divided between God and the world, and serving both, but rewarded by neither.

XC.

IN the obscurity of retirement, amid the squalid poverty and revolting privations of a cottage, it has often been my lot to witness scenes of magnanimity and self-denial, as much beyond the belief, as the practice of the great; an heroism borrowing no support, either from the gaze of the many, or the admiration of the few, yet, flourishing amidst ruins, and on the confines of the grave; a spectacle as stupendous in the moral world, as the falls of the Missouri, in the natural; and, like that mighty cataract, doomed to display its grandeur, only where there are no eyes to appreciate its magnificence.

XCI.

LADY Mary Wortley Montague observed, that in the whole course of her long and extensive travels, she had found but two sorts of people, men and women. This simple remark was founded on no small knowledge of human nature; but, we might add, that even this distinction, narrow as it is, is now gradually disappearing; for some of our beaus are imitating the women, in every thing that is little, and some of our women are imitating the men, in every thing that is great. Miss Edgeworth and Madame de Stael,

[ocr errors]

have proved that there is no sex in style; and Madame La Roche Jacqueline and the Duchess d'Angouleme, have proved that there is also no sex in courage. Barbarous or refined, in rags, or in ruffles, at St. Giles's or St. James's, covered with the skins of quadrupeds, or the costly entrails of an insect, we are in essentials the same. We pursue the same goods, and fly the same evils; we loathe and love, and hope and fear, from causes that differ little in themselves, but only in their circumstances and modifications. Hence, it happens that the irony of Lucian, the discriminations of Theophrastus, the strength of Juvenal, and the wit of Horace, are felt and relished alike by those who have inhaled the clear air of the Parthenon, the skies of Italy, or the fogs of London; and have been alike admired on the banks of the Melissus, the Tiber, or the Thames. A Scotch highlander was taken prisoner by a tribe of Indians, his life was about to be sacrificed, when the chief adopted him as his son. They carried him into the interior; he learnt their language, assumed their habits, and became skilful in the use of their arms. After a season, the same tribe began their route to join the French army, at that time opposed to the English. It was necessary to pass near to the English lines during the night. Very early in the morning, and it was spring, the old chief roused the young highlander from his repose; he took him to an eminence, and pointed out to him the tents of his countrymen. The old man appeared to be dreadfully agitated, and there was a keen restlessness in his eye. After a pause; "I lost," said he, " my only son in the battle with your nation; are you the only son of your father? and do you think that your father is yet alive?" The young man replied, "I am the only son of my father, and I hope that my father is yet alive." They stood close to a beautiful magnolio in full blossom. The prospect was grand and enchanting, and all its charms were crowned by the sun, which had fully emerged from the horizon. The old chief looking stedfastly at his companion, exclaimed, "Let thy heart rejoice at the beauty of the scene! to me it is as the desert; but you are free; return to your countrymen,

« PreviousContinue »