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in that situation. Croker has also slain such damning marks of guilt about it Savary in the fashion of a true man: as to call for any particular demonLa Balafré himself never hewed down stration of pleasure at its punishment? a vagabond more completely.
Not it. For even supposing him to be Give me, therefore, rest for one guilty of what these ruffians charge month. I will not write an article on him with, it would be at most a mere the Metropolitan Review ; I wish it sin of office, and certainly, taken at its every success, and hail its great and worst, not pointed out by anything continually increasing circulation, as peculiar from the common herd of a proof that the country is in a healthy such affairs. Many a good Whig forstate. I am told it sells abou 12,500, tune is ultimately derivable from pecuwhile Jeffrey's stuff certainly can- lation, but that is never flung into the not pollute the nation to a greater face of my Lord Holland, or any other extent than 5000, if so much. Were- of the worthies. But nobody who member, Kit, when affairs were dif- knows the man or the transaction susferently arranged in the monde lite- pects him of guilt. There must then raire, and I flatter myself, that you, and be something personal in the rancour others, whose names need not to be against Hook: and that is neither more mentioned, are to be not a little thank- nor less than that he is supposed to be ed for the amelioration. But though a chief writer in John Bull. This is I do not wish to make my usual ap- the real reason why he is persecuted pearance in Maga this month, I have by people in office, and abused by yet a subject to write to you about scoundrels out of it. which I am ashamed that you or some
Whether Hook is John Bull or not, other person on our side of the ques- I cannot say. He denies it; but in tion, more competent or more influen- this unbelieving age denials of such tial than I am, has not taken up ale things go for nothing. John Wilson ready. I mean the case of Mr Theo- Croker was suspected; he too denied dore Hook, who, I perceive by the it; so did Luttrel ; so did Horace papers, has been arrested for his defi- Twiss; and perhaps we shall by and ciency at the Mauritius.
by have a flat negative from Joseph never has fairly been exhibited to the Grimaldi, or Joseph Hume. But, adpublic, for reasons which I shall pro- mitting the fact, what is the particular bably explain as I go on.
sin in conducting the Bull ? It abuses Let me make a few prefatory re- its political opponents right and left, marks on the conduct of the press.
but I submit that is no more than what You know everybody knows-the is done by every clever newspaper on intensity of my contempt for the peo- every side of the question: I never ple connected with the London news- heard of a Tory who would feel any papers : I make this assertion, of satisfaction on learning that any uncourse, with due exceptions. But political calamity had befallen James really I was not prepared for the blood- Perry, or William Cobbett. The darhound exultation which some of them ling fellows who bawl against it, talk expressed on this occasion. The same with faces of brass of the peculiar papers which, with blockhead sympa- cruelty of its observations defamatory thy, lamented over the firm mind, the to female reputation. Gentle and chivigorous determination, the &c. &c. of valrous souls! Is it not enough to Jack Thurtell the murderer, a fellow make a man's gorge rise to hear such who was no more to be respected on undefecated humbug ? Female reaccount of any mental accomplishment putation indeed! John Bull had the than the ordinary run of gentlemen of courage to oppose the rabid faction the press, chuckled with joy at the ar- which advocated the unfortunate rest of Mr Hook, who, by the way, Queen, and to display her, and those never had done anything to avoid that who were linked with her, in true result. Paragraph after paragraph colours, to the indignation of the poured from the filthy prints, lie after chaste and virtuous. You might as lie was studiously repeated, and I am well reprobate the Roman historians informed, that it was even placarded, for painting Messalina, as the John with every circumstance of insult that Bull for exposing Caroline. And who could enter the numscull jobbernouls are they who make the charge? The of their conductors. And why was Whigs--the men whose poetical orthis done? Had Mr Hook's offence gan is Tom Moore, the author of the
Twopenny Postbag, (whose public two years before, had made the error,
on the ground that such sad mischief in matters of infi- he did not make the best bargains for nitely higher moment, sacrificed by Government in sales of bills, and that those whose most vital interests the he was not sufficiently careful in the publication supposed to be his has issue of specie, which he made against served in the highest.
paper, or local arrangements,-and Such has been the extent of misre- other details which would not be inpresentation on the subject, that I ven- teresting to you, or your readers, and ture to say, not one in a thousand who with which I suppose we shall be respeak about it, knows exactly how the galed in due time from his own pen. thing is. The common inpression fos- I allude to them, merely to shew that tered by the pot-house paper is, that he has been most studiously misreHook robbed the treasury committed presented, and most determinately to his care of £12,000; that, in fact, he misunderstood. thrust his hand into the chest, ab- Why, it may be asked, do I, living stracted that sum, and put it coolly here, in this auld-warld neuk, give into his pocket. Nothing can be more myself the trouble of defending a man directly contrary to the fact. In a few whom I never saw, and whom, in words I shall give you Hook's real all probability, I never shall see? or case, and then trouble you with some what is there in his arrest, which remarks on the business. Here are ought to call forth our attention? I the facts.
shall just tell you. I do not care a Mr Hook's chief confidential clerk, fig's end for Hook--but I do care for whose duty it was to make up the Trea- the intense plucklessness of our party. sury accounts of the Mauritius, made It makes me perfectly indignant, at up those of November 1816 with an times, when I think of the courage with error of £9000 in them; notwithstand- which the Whigs have at all times paing which, they were audited, and had tronized their men, and the cowardice been passed correct for two years. In generally displayed by our Tory chiefthe meantime he delivered over the tains. I shall not go back to Sir R. Treasury to a new governor, and re- Walpole, for the management of his ceived a certificate, which is published Whiggish sovereignty would be too in the parliamentary papers on the gross and palpable for our times. But subject, from five principal officers of look at what they did, when they had government, attesting its correctness, last a glimpse of authority. They gave and giving him, under their hands, à a place to Moore, their lampoon-mandischarge for the entire balance. Three to Hallam, their great Balaamite--they months after this, the chief clerk who, posted Sidney Smith, their jack-pud
ding parson-in fact, everybody who in authority calmly look on, and con
could write a libel for them, or who tent themselves with saying, “ A very had ever wielded a pen in their cause, hard case this of Hook's. We wish no mattter how obtuse and nebless the him out of it ; but, you know, it would tool might have been, was rewarded. not look well for us to interfere.”On the contrary, it appears to be al. Why? -The answer is at hand. “Bemost a fixed principle with us, that cause we should be afraid that, if we whenever a man does anything for the did, it would be said, we did so on accause of Toryism, he is to be immedia count of his supposed connection with ately given up—he is looked upon as John Bull;"- and there is the plucka sort of thing of course, and left to lessness of which I complain, and battle with his adversaries, not only which is the reason of my writing without the countenance of the great you this letter. Tory leaders, but under a studious This sneaking cowardice our miniwithdrawing of their support. I must sterial men carry into a thousand desay, that they order these things bet- partments. As I have often said, it is ter among the Whigs.*
à sin not visible among the Whigs. Let me not be so misunderstood for Had they a John Bull among them, a moment as to be thought to be pray- they would boldly stand by him for ing for patronage. I despise such a his writings in their behalf,--not afthought from the bottom of my soul. fect to cut him in his difficulties. I We know, North, how little of that wish we could borrow this leaf out of kind of thing we, for instance, either their book; not that I wish for any looked for or received. Thank Heaven, undue support for our literary people, the general strength of Toryism just but that the mere fact of their being now is so great, that we are indepen- for us should not deprive them of comdent of the smiles or the frowns of mon justice. I hope Hook's business any knot of ministerial people, whom will make its appearance before Parwe puff or abuse as we please. But I liament this approaching session, and, must say, that it is not fair, that be- when there, that it will be fairly met cause a man has been active, or has by ministers. Among them, there is been suspected of being active in their at least one man who ought to take i behalf, he should be conciliated away the courage of speaking up, -I mean --that he should suffer harder treat- George Canning. The editor of the ment than anybody else, out of mere Antijacobin ought not to look on it as candour and official deference to op- a crime unpardonable to be accused ponents. Now here is a case, in which (for it comes to that) of writing the a gentleman, whom nobody at all ac- John Bull. cuses of dishonourable proceedings, Loves, compliments, &c. in all quarwhose affairs admit of equitable ar- ters where they are due. Yours, rangement,--who is labouring under
T. TICKLER. difficulties brought on by the negligence of people under him and over P.S. I hope you are above the silhim, is treated with a degree of rigour liness of declining to print my letter. never exerted against one but the most There will be, of course, the usual marked criminal. Extents have been trashery of a fellow-feeling for John issued against his property, which has Bull,-or, it may be said, that I have been twice seized and sold, and against written this to oblige Hook,-or, in his person, which has been thirteen or fact, what the jack-asses about you fourteen months in confinement in one are always braying about. But never prison or other. All the little malice mind that. You know why I have of an underling board has been exert- written it; and you know that is what ed against him, instigated by political I have been in the habit of saying for enemies, who hate him for his suspect- a very long time. ed support of ministers; while people
* There was a fine story lately in the Morning Chronicle, given on occasion of Lord Erskine's death.-It represented him as leaving the woolsack when Chancel. lor of England !!! and walking to the bar of the House of Lords !!! on purpose to tell Jemmy Pirie that he (the Chancellor) had that morning given a living in the Church of England!!! to one of his (Jemmy's) worn-out hacks of reporters !!! This anecdote should never be forgotten.
ONCE MORE IN LONDON. Londinium-cognomento quidem coloniæ non insigne !!~sed copia negotiatorum et commeatuum maxime celebre.
TACIT. Annal. xiv. 33. The taking up of old and interrupt- tage, indeed, there was in this ambied local associations, is generally at- tious apartment, that if a fire should tended, in consequence of the mere take place in the better frequented lapse of time, and the ordinary effects floors of this immense barrack, “ourof that circumstance, with more pain selves” and the pigeons would probathan pleasure; the revival of acquaint- bly be the longest survivors. ance, even with his own country, to an Englishman rather striking than
6 Ultimus ardebit quem tegula sola tuetur agreeable, as far as all external circum
A pluvia, molles ubi reddunt ova colum. stances are concerned. The advantages of England do not present them- The balance between sleep and selves in relief, even to ourselves ; watching is often very nicely poised. In they all lie below the surface; we are the present instance, it was quickly compelled to look for them, to insinu- turned in favour of the latter, by the ate ourselves anew into them, and to novelty of my position, and a swarm of accede, in a variety of ways, at first accumulating recollections. At last disagreeable, to the conditions annexed came the dawn, and with it the conscito them. Our society (though we on- ousness (more luxurious than sleep itly find it out by comparison) is all self) of going to sleep the night serstiff, formal, frigid; se gèner,” a vants were all snoring, the coach office term so abhorrent to other nations, is itself was hush'd, not a hoof was inseparable from it: but it is rational yet heard on the silex below, nor other and intelligent, although defective in sound than that of a restless fidgetty gaiety, and after its own fashion, even horse taking a snatch or two of hay at polite. One of the very worst forms unseasonable hours, when long before a in which London presents itself, even sparrow thought it worth his while to to a Londoner, is that of the inn, ho- chirp at the window, a little demon tel, xenodocheion, khan, or caravanse- emerged from a neighbouring chimney, ra, to which, (if he have no household and uttered the dolorous cry of his gods of his own,) he must repair on miserable trade! I never curse a chimhis arrival. What then must a French- ney sweeper, though a good curser in man, or a native of Southern Europe, my own way, however unseasonably think of a similar reception ?-The he visits me, chiefly, I believe, because soi-disant coffee-room, stalled off like he is a child, and of all children the a stable, with its two or three miser- most luckless : “Ah, who can tell how able candles, its sanded floor, its pha- hard it is to climb!”-I betook myself, lanx of empty decanters, and wine therefore, to the more innocent emglasses full of tooth-picks and wafers, ployment of musing on other visitings its solitude and its silence ! To such a of aerial voices that I had chanced to place was I obliged to betake myself, hear. There was the hymn by the
I after a first and a long absence, which little choristers from the top of Maghad cancelled abundance of national dalen tower, on the first of May, at four prejudices, and impaired the power of o'clock in the morning“O mihi præaccommodating to the habits I was teritos referet si Jupiter annos !"-One about to resume. The newspapers,
could easily dispense with a night's those polyglott versions of the infinite- rest in those days!-(You,my very dear ly diversified events, accidents, crimes, Oxford reader, should not neglect to punishments, and contingencies of an assist for once at this ancient and enormous metropolis, for a single day, touching piece of monastic devotion; were the only resource. But their you may afterwards walk up Heddinginterest was lost to me, and after lis- ton hill, and be back in plenty time tening a-while to the ticking of the for chapel, or, what you care more dial, and making many a fretful glance about, for breakfast.) To this suçat the coffee-house system of Naples, ceeded another propitious recollection : Venice, and Paris, I abruptly sum- namely, my first expergefaction at moned the chambermaid, and followed Farsa (Pharsalia ;) there was a tall her to the cell to which she had des- minaret just above my window : à tined me for the night. One advan- thin silvery voice awoke me on the
the most delightful of autumnal mornings. It was directed toward Mecca, and it spoke of Universal Allah, and of prayer! Unfortunately this last reflection (when a man begins to reflect, there is no knowing where it will end) suggested another-I had begun to think of writing about my travels, and this made all farther expostulations with sleep useless; for, except a bad conscience, nothing is so fatal to that best gift of the gods, as projected or progressive authorship. What would not one sometimes give, during these unwelcome vigils, for a candle and a pencil? In the morning, either the thought is gone, or the curiosa felicitas of expression, in which you had finally embalmed it, cannot be recovered! That the author, whether of books or mischief, can contrive to sleep at all, is indeed a marvel!" L'auteur de tant de maux connoit donc le sommeil ?" Gentle reader, read Mots-meo periculo, as Bentley says.
The first morning of one's return Qiday 15 margida yalar, has plenty of occupation-Lodgings to be procured, a matter of very grave consideration, and not always, where so many pug nantia secum points are to be reconciled, of very facile accomplishment-per varios casus, tendemus in Latiumquarters at once genteel, quiet, airy, cheerful, sunny, economical; not too near one's tailor, (you have perhaps just stumbled on his last year's bill, with all its array of blue coats no longer in existence:) hic labor, hoc opus est! The night coaches and mails were now trundling in, and the morning ones rattling out; (I like to avail myself of improvements in language.) Those vast cinerary urns, the dust-carts, equipped with bell, basket, and ladder, and huge as the soros of an Egyptian king, were collecting their morning of ferings of dust, and ashes, and other penitential exuvia; all sufficient intimations, that, for a man who had his lodgings to seek, it was not quite time to rise.
I hate bells: I hate all bells whatever, except sheep-bells; even muffin-bells find no favour in my sight; and I therefore hold in particular abhorrence that consecrated barbarian, Urbanus VIII., who, not content with the spoliation of the Pantheon of all the bronze of Agrippa, as a sort of ultra-barbarism, caused it to be made into what he calls "sacra tympana." How glad I am, therefore,
that in the order and economy of human affairs, my visit to Rome was postponed till those horrid fellows, the Corybantes, (who used to run about clashing cymbals, and making other hideous noises,) were as dead as Constantine. Indeed, I hate noise of all kinds, where the elements of it can be distinguished; where these are blended into one grand and imposing composition-one magnificent diapasonas in the great streets of London or Naples, one's ear drinks in the harmony of the great wave of sound with a pleasure analogous to that which the eye derives from examining complicated machinery, or even from the sight of multitudes going we know not whither, and coming we care not whence. But, in the small quiet streets and squares, where the vocal and instrumental parts are directed by the very demon of discord; where tracheas of both sexes, and of all calibres, sustain themselves contentiously among bells, bagpipes, ballad-singers, barrelorgans, clarionets, cod-fish, cabbages, and cat's meat-to say nothing of the rumbling of carts, the rattling of coaches, the jingling of hoops, and the barking of curs, which are merely ac companiments-why the man that is not moved by this concord of sweet sounds, is well deserving of the anathema of Shakespeare. How thankfully does one hear the emphatic double knock of the postman at 12 o'clock, which usually disperses these "diversa monstra ferarum" for the day. Where is the book, in these degenerate times, so amusing, or the occupation so interesting, as to suspend the acute sense of them? The Greeks and Persians, you recollect, were so hard at it, as to lose the agrement of the earthquake that happened during the battle of-I forget which-the story is known. See Herodotus. It is, Scottish reader, or Irish, allow me to inform you, that it is of no use to quit your lodgings, for these Eumenides stick to your flanks as they did to Orestes; omnibus umbra locis adero; dabis, improbe, pœnas;-of no use to pay or persuade creatures alike inexorable and incorruptible. The only palliative that I know is, to read a canto of the Gierusalemme aloud, or a long passage of the Eneid, in your softest and mellowest tone; (this expedient used to compose Burke when he was ruffled.) Above all things, beware of fiddling or fluting in