to me, "Poor sinner, though thou hast dealt un-hast earnestly sought him; hath met thee in public and private; hath been found of thee in the congregation, in thy house, in thy closet, in the field, in thy waking nights, in thy deepest dangers.

13. If bounty and compassion be an attractive of love, how unmeasurably then am I bound to love him! All the mercies that have filled up my life, all the places that ever I abode in, all the societies and persons I have been conver

And how does How should I But shall I dare

kindly with me, and cast me off; yet I will not do so by thee. Though thou hast set light by me, and all my mercies, yet they and myself are all thine. What wouldst thou have that I can give thee? And what dost thou want that I cannot give thee? If any thing I have will give thee pleasure, thou shalt have it. Wouldst thou have pardon? I freely forgive thee all the debt. Wouldst thou have grace and peace? Thou shalt have them both. Wouldst thou have my-sant with, all my employments and relations, self? Behold I am thine, thy Friend, thy Lord, thy Brother, Husband, and Head. Wouldst thou have the Father? I will bring thee to him, and thou shalt have him, in and by me." These were my Lord's reviving words. After all, when I was doubtful of his love, methinks I yet remember his overcoming arguments: "Have I done so much, sinner, to testify my love, and yet dost thou doubt? Have I offered thee myself and love so long, and yet dost thou question my willingness to be thine? At what dearer rate should I tell thee that I love thee? Wilt thou not believe my bitter passion proceeded from love? Have I made myself in the gospel a lion to thine enemies, and a lamb to thee, and dost thou overlook my lamb-like nature? Had I been willing to let thee perish, what need have I done and suffered so much? What need I follow thee with such patience and importunity? Why dost thou tell me of thy wants; have I not enough for me and thee? Or of thy unworthiness; for if thou wast thyself worthy, what shouldst thou do with my worthiness? Did I ever invite, or save the worthy and the righteous; or is there any such upon earth? Hast thou nothing; art thou lost and miserable, helpless and forlorn? Dost thou believe I am an allsufficient Saviour, and wouldst thou have me? Lo, I am thine, take me; if thou art willing, am; and neither sin, nor Satan, shall break the match." These, O these, were the blessed words which his Spirit from his gospel spoke unto me, till he made me cast myself at his feet, and cry out, "My Saviour and my Lord, thou hast broken, thou hast revived my heart; thou hast overcome, thou hast won my heart; take it, it is thine; if such a heart can please thee, take it; if it cannot, make it such as thou wouldst have it." Thus, O my soul, mayest thou remember the sweet familiarity thou hast had with Christ; therefore, if acquaintance will cause affection, let out thy heart unto him. It is he that hath stood by the bed of sickness, hath eased thy pains, refreshed thy weariness, and removed thy fears. He hath been always ready, when thou

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every condition I have been in, and every change I have passed through, all tell me, that the fountain is overflowing goodness. Lord, what a sum of love am I indebted to thee! my debt continually increase! love again for so much love? to think of requiting thee, or of recompensing all thy love with mine? Will my mite requite thee for thy golden mines; my seldom wishes, for thy constant bounty; mine which is nothing, or not mine, for thine which is infinite, and thine own? Shall I dare to contend in love with thee; or set my borrowed languid spark against the Sun of love? Can I love as high, as deep, as broad, as long as love itself? as much as he that made me, and that made me love, and gave me all that little which I have? As I cannot match thee in the works of power, nor make, nor preserve, nor rule the worlds; no more can I match thee in love. No, Lord, I yield; I am overcome. O blessed conquest! Go on victoriously, and still prevail, and triumph in thy love. The captive of love shall proclaim thy victory; when thou leadest me in triumph from earth to heaven, from death to life, from the tribunal to the throne; myself, and all that see it, shall acknowledge thou hast prevailed, and all shall say "Behold how he loved him!" Yet let me love, in subjection to thy love; as thy redeemed captive, though not thy peer. Shall I not love at all, because I cannot reach thy measure? O that I could feelingly say, "I love thee, even as I love my friend, and myself!" Though I cannot say, as the apostle, Thou knowest that I love thee;" yet I can say, "Lord, thou knowest that I would love thee!" I am angry with my heart, that it doth not love thee; I chide it, yet it doth not mend; I reason with it, and would fain persuade it, yet I do not perceive it stir; I rub and chafe it in the use of ordinances, and yet I feel it not warm within me. Unworthy soul! Is not thine eye now upon the only lovely object? Art thou not now beholding the ravishing glory of the saints? And dost thou not love? Art thou not a rational soul, and should not reason tell thee,

that earth is a dungeon to the celestial glory? Art thou not thyself a spirit, and shouldst thou not love God, "who is a spirit, and the Father of spirits ?" Why dost thou love so much thy perishing clay, and love no more the heavenly glory? Shalt thou love when thou comest there; when the Lord shall take thy carcass from the grave, and make thee shine as the sun in glory for ever and ever; shalt thou then love, or shalt thou not? Is not the place a meeting of lovers? Is not the life a state of love? Is it not the great marriage day of the Lamb? Is not the employment there the work of love, where the souls with Christ take their fill? O then, my soul, begin it here! Be sick with love now, that thou mayest be well with love there. Keep thyself now in the love of God; and let neither life, nor death, nor any thing separate thee from it; and thou shalt be kept in the fullness of love for ever, and nothing shall imbitter or abate thy pleasure; for the Lord hath prepared a city of love, a place for communicating love to his chosen, "and they that love his name shall dwell therein."

14. 'Awake then, O my drowsy soul! To sleep under the light of grace is unreasonable, much more in the approach of the light of glory. Come forth, my dull congealed spirit, thy Lord bids thee "rejoice, and again rejoice." Thou hast lain long enough in thy prison of flesh, where Satan hath been thy jailor; cares have been thy irons, fears thy scourges, and thy food the bread and water of affliction; where sorrows have been thy lodging, and thy sins and foes have made thy bed, and an unbelieving heart hath been the gates and bars that have kept thee in; the Angel of the covenant now calls thee, and bids thee arise, and follow him. Up, 0 my soul! and cheerfully obey, and thy bolts and bars shall all fly open; follow the Lamb whithersoever he goeth. Shouldst thou fear to follow such a guide? Can the sun lead thee to a state of darkness? Will he lead thee to death, who died to save thee from it? Follow him, and he will show thee the paradise of God; he will give thee a sight of the New Jerusalem, and a taste of the tree of life. Come forth, my drooping soul, and lay aside thy winter dress; let it be seen by thy garments of joy and praise, that the spring is come; and as thou now seest thy comforts green, thou shalt shortly see them "white and ripe for harvest," and then thou shalt be called to reap, and gather, and take possession. Should I suspend and delay my joys till then? Should not the joys of the spring go before the joys of harvest? Is title nothing before pos

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session? Is the heir in no better a state than a slave? My Lord hath taught me to rejoice in hope of his glory, and how to see it through the bars of a prison, for when persecuted for righteousness' sake, he commands me to "rejoice and be exceeding glad," because my reward in heaven is great. I know he would have my joys exceed my sorrows, and as much as he delights in "the humble and contrite," he yet more delights in the soul that "delights in him.” Hath my Lord spread me a table in this wilderness, and furnished it with the promises of everlasting glory, and set before me angels' food? Doth he frequently and importunately invite me to sit down, and feed, and spare not? Hath he, to that end, furnished me with reason, and faith, and a joyful disposition, and is it possible that he should be unwilling to have me rejoice? Is it not his command, to " delight thyself in the Lord ;" and his promise, to "give thee the desires of thine heart?" Art thou not charged to "rejoice evermore," yea, to "sing aloud, and shout for joy!" Why should I then be discouraged? My God is willing, if I were but willing. He is delighted with my delights. He would have it my constant frame, and daily business, to be near him in my believing meditations, and to live in the sweetest thoughts of his goodness. O blessed employment, fit for the sons of God! But thy feast, my Lord, is nothing to me without an appetite. Thou hast set the dainties of heaven before me; but, alas, I am blind, and cannot see them! I am sick, and cannot relish them! I am so benumbed, that I cannot put forth a hand to take them. I therefore humbly beg this grace, that as thou hast opened heaven to me in thy word, so thou wouldst open mine eyes to see it, and my heart to delight in it; else heaven will be no heaven to me. O thou Spirit of life, breathe upon thy graces in me; take me by the hand, and lift me from the earth, that I may see what glory thou hast prepared for them that love thee!

15. Away then, ye soul-tormenting cares and fears, ye heart-vexing sorrows! At least forbear a little while: stand by; stay here below till I go up and see my rest. The way is strange to me, but not to Christ. There was the eternal abode of his glorious deity; and thither hath he also brought his glorified flesh. It was his work to purchase it; it is his to prepare it, and to prepare me for it, and bring me to it. The eternal God of truth hath given me his promise, his seal and oath, that, believing in Christ, I shall not perish, but have everlasting life. Thither shall my soul be speedily removed, and my body very shortly

follow. And can my tongue say, that I shall shortly | mountains, heal diseases with a word or a touch, and surely live with God; and yet my heart not or cast out devils, should I not rejoice in such leap within me ? Can I say it with faith and privileges and honours as these, and shall I not not with joy? Ah faith, how sensibly do I now much more rejoice that my name is written in perceive thy weakness! But though unbelief heaven? I cannot here enjoy my parents, or darken my light, and dull my life, and suppress my near and beloved friends, without some demy joys, it shall not be able to conquer and des- light: especially when I did freely let out my aftroy me; though it envy all my comforts, yet fection to my friend, how sweet was that exersome in spite of it I shall even here receive; and cise of my love! O what will it then be to live if that did not hinder, what abundance might I in the perpetual love of God! "For brethren have! The light of heaven would shine into to dwell together in unity here, how good and my heart; and I might be almost as familiar how pleasant it is!" To see a family live in love, there, as I am on earth. Come away then, my husband and wife, parents, children, and servants, soul; stop thine ears to the ignorant language doing all in love to one another; to see a town of infidelity; thou art able to answer all its ar- live together in love, without any envyings, guments; or if thou art not, yet tread them under brawlings, or contentions, lawsuits, factions, or thy feet. Come away: stand not looking on that divisions, but every man loving his neighbour grave, nor turning those bones, nor reading thy as himself, thinking they can never do too much lesson now in the dust; those lines will soon be for one another, but striving to go beyond each wiped out. But lift up thy head, and look to other in love; how happy, how delightful a sight heaven, and see thy name written in golden is this! O then, what a blessed society will the letters "in the book of life of the Lamb that family of heaven be, and those peaceful inhabiwas slain." What if an angel should tell thee, tants of the New Jerusalem, where there is no that there is a mansion in heaven prepared for division, nor differing judgments, no disaffection thee, that it shall certainly be thine for ever; nor strangeness, no deceitful friendship, no, not would not such a message make thee glad? one unkind expression, not an angry look or And dost thou make light of the infallible word thought; but all are one in Christ, who is one of promise, which was delivered by the Spirit, with the Father, and all live in the love of him, and even by the Son himself? Suppose thou who is love itself! The soul is not more where hadst seen a fiery chariot come for thee, and fetch it lives, than where it loves. How near then thee up to heaven, like Elijah; would not this will my soul be united to God, when I shall so rejoice thee? But thy Lord assures thee, that heartily, strongly, and incessantly love him! the soul of Lazarus hath a convoy of angels to Ah, wretched unbelieving heart, that can think carry it into Abraham's bosom. Shall a drunkard of such a day, and work, and life as this, with be so merry among his cups, or the glutton in such low and feeble joys! But my future enhis delicious fare, and shall not I rejoice who joyments will be more lively. must shortly be in heaven? Can meat and drink delight me when I hunger and thirst? Can I find pleasure in walks and gardens, and convenient dwellings? Can beautiful objects delight mine eyes; or grateful odours my smell; or melody my ears? And shall not the forethought of celestial bliss delight me? Methinks among my books I could employ myself in sweet content, and bid the world farewell, and pity the rich and great that know not this happiness; what then will my happiness in heaven be, where my knowledge will be perfect! If the Queen of Sheba came from the utmost parts of the earth to hear the wisdom of Solomon,and see his glory; how cheerfully should I pass from earth to heaven, to see the glory of the eternal Majesty, and attain the height of wisdom, compared with which, the most learned on earth are but fools and idiots! What if God had made me commander of the earth; what if I could remove

16. How delightful is it to me to behold and study these inferior works of creation! What a beautiful fabric do we here dwell in ; the floor so dressed with herbs, and flowers, and trees, and watered with springs and rivers; the roof so widely expanded, so admirably adorned! What wonders do sun, moon, and stars, seas, and winds contain! And hath God prepared such a house for corruptible flesh, for a soul imprisoned: and doth he bestow so many millions of wonders upon his enemies? O what a dwelling must that be, which he prepares for his dearly beloved children; and how will the glory of the New Jerusalem exceed all the present glory of the creatures! Arise, then, O my soul, in thy contemplation; and let thy thoughts of that glory as far exceed in sweetness thy thoughts of the excellencies below! Fear not to go out of this body, and this world, when thou must make so happy a change; but say, as one did when he

was dying, "I am glad, and even leap for joy, or thy sickness, or thy natural death? Is it not that the time is come in which that mighty the same heaven which they and I must live in? Jehovah, whose majesty in my search of nature Is not their God, their Christ, their crown, and I have admired, whose goodness I have adored, mine, the same? And shall I look upon it with whom by faith I have desired and panted after, an eye so dim, a heart so dull, a countenance so will now show himself to me face to face." dejected. Some small foretastes of it have I myself had: and how much more delightful have they been, than any earthly things ever were and what then will the full enjoyment

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17. How wonderful also are the works of Providence! How delightful to see the great God interest himself in the safety and advancement of a few humble, praying, but despised be! persons; and to review those special mercies with which my own life hath been adorned and sweetened! How often have my prayers been heard, my tears regarded, my troubled soul relieved! How often hath my Lord bid me be of good cheer! What a support are these experiences, these clear testimonies of my Father's love to my fearful unbelieving heart! O then, what a blessed day will that be, when I shall have all mercy, perfection of mercy, and fully enjoy the Lord of mercy; when I shall stand on the shore, and look back on the raging seas I have safely passed; when I shall review my pains and sorrows, my fears and tears, and possess the glory which was the end of all! If one drop of lively faith was mixed with these considerations, what a heaven-ravishing heart should I carry within me! Fain would " I believe; Lord, help my unbelief!"

18. How sweet, O my soul, have ordinances been to thee! What delight hast thou had in prayer, and thanksgiving, under heavenly sermons, and in the society of saints, and to see "the Lord adding to the church such as should be saved!" How then can my heart conceive the joy which I shall have, to see the perfected church in heaven, and to be admitted into the celestial temple, and with the heavenly host praise the Lord for ever! If the word of God was sweeter to Job than his necessary food, and to David than honey and the honeycomb, and was the joy and rejoicing of Jeremiah's heart; how blessed a day will that be, when we shall fully enjoy the Lord of this word, and shall no more need these written precepts and promises, nor read any book but the face of the glorious God! If they that heard Christ speak on earth, were astonished at his wisdom and answers, and wondered at the gracious words that proceeded out of his mouth; how shall I then be affected to behold him in his majesty!

19. Can the prospect of this glory make others welcome the cross, and even refuse deliverance; and cannot it make thee cheerful under lesser sufferings? Can it sweeten the flames of martyrdom; and not sweeten thy life,

What a beauty is there here in the imperfect graces of the Spirit! Alas! how small are these to what we shall enjoy in our perfect state! What a happy life should I here live, could I but love God as much as I would ; could I be all love, and always loving! O my soul, what wouldst thou give for such a life? Had I such apprehensions of God, such knowledge of his word as I desire; could I fully trust him in all my straits; could I be as lively as I would in every duty; could I make God my constant desire and delight; I would not envy the world their honours or pleasures. What a blessed state, O my soul! wilt thou shortly be in, when thou shalt have far more of these than thou canst now desire, and shalt exercise thy perfected graces in the immediate vision of God, and not in the dark, and at a distance, as now.

21. Is the sinning, afflicted, persecuted church of Christ, so much more excellent than any particular gracious soul? What then will the church be, when it is fully gathered and glorified; when it is ascended from the valley of tears to mount Sion; when it shall sin and suffer no more! The glory of the Old Jerusalem will be darkness and deformity to the glory of the New. What cause shall we have then to shout for joy, when we shall see how glorious the heavenly temple is, and remember the meanness of the church on earth!

22. But, alas! what a loss am I at in the midst of my contemplations! I thought my heart had all the while attended, but I see it hath not. What life is there in empty thoughts and words, without affections? Neither God, nor I, find pleasure in them. Where hast thou been, unworthy heart, while I was opening to thee the everlasting treasures? Art thou not ashamed to complain so much of an uncomfortable life, and to murmur at God for filling thee with sorrows, when he in vain offers thee the delights of angels? Hadst thou now but followed me close, it would have made thee revive and leap for joy, and forget thy pains and sorrows. Did I think my heart had been so backward to rejoice!

also been bitter? And, at best, what are they to the everlasting views of the God of truth? Thy friends here have been thy delight; and have they not also been thy vexation and grief? They are gracious; and are they not also sinful? They are kind; and are they not soon displeased? They are humble; but, alas! how proud

also! Their graces are sweet, and their gifts helpful; but are not their corruptions bitter, and their imperfections hurtful? And art thou so loth to go from them to thy God?

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O my soul, look above this world of sorrows! Hast thou so long felt the smarting rod of affliction, and no better understood its meaning? Is not every stroke to drive thee hence ? Is not its voice like that to Elijah, "What dost thou here?" Dost thou forget thy Lord's prediction, "In the world ye shall have tribulation; in me ye may have peace?" Ah, my dear Lord, I feel thy meaning; it is written in my flesh, engraved in my bones. My heart thou aimest at; thy rod drives, thy silken cord of love draws; and all to bring it to thyself. Lord, can such a heart be worth thy having; make it worthy, and then it is thine: take it to thyself, and then take me. This clod hath life to stir, but not to rise. As the feeble child to the tender mother, it looketh up to thee, and stretcheth out the hands, and fain would have thee take it up. Though I cannot say, 66 my soul longeth after thee;" yet I can say, I long for such a longing heart. "The spirit is willing, the flesh is weak." My spirit cries, "let thy kingdom come," or let me come to thy kingdom; but the flesh is afraid thou shouldst hear my prayer, and take me at my word. O blessed be thy grace, which makes use of my corruptions to kill themselves; for I fear my fears, and sorrow for my sorrows, and long for greater longs; and thus the painful means of attaining my desires increase my weariness, and that makes me groan to be at rest.

23. Lord, thou hast reserved my perfect joys | If thy studies have been sweet, have they not for heaven; therefore, help me to desire till I may possess, and let me long when I cannot, as I would, rejoice. O my soul, thou knowest, to thy sorrow, that thou art not yet at thy rest. When shall I arrive at that safe and quiet harbour where there are none of these storms, waves, and dangers; when I shall never more have a weary restless night or day? Then my life will not be such a mixture of hope and fear, of joy and sorrow; nor shall flesh and spirit be combating within me; nor faith and unbelief, humility and pride, maintain a continual conflict. O when shall I be past these soul-tormenting fears, and cares, and griefs? When shall I be out of this soul-contradicting, ensnaring, deceitful flesh; this corruptible body, this vain, vexatious world? Alas! that I must stand and see the church and cause of Christ tossed about in contention, and made subservient to private interests, or deluded fancies! There is none of this disorder in the heavenly Jerusalem: there I shall find a harmonious concert of perfected spirits, obeying and praising their everlasting King. O how much better to be a door-keeper there, than the commander of this tumultuous world! Why am I no more weary of this weariness? Why do I so forget my resting-place? Up then, O my soul, in thy most raised and fervent desires! Stay not till this flesh can desire with thee; expect not that sense should apprehend thy blessed object, and tell thee when and what to desire. Doth not the dullness of thy desires after rest, accuse thee of most detestable ingratitude and folly? Must thy Lord procure thee a rest at so dear a rate, and dost thou no more value it? Must he go before to prepare so glorious a mansion for such a wretch, and art thou loth to go and possess it! Shall the Lord of glory be desirous of thy company, and thou not desirous of his? Must earth become a very hell to thee, before thou art willing to be with God? Behold the most lovely creature, or the most desirable state, and tell me where wouldst thou be, if not with God? Poverty is a burden; riches a snare; sickness unpleasing; health unsafe; the frowning world bruises thy heel; the smiling world stings thee to the heart so much as the world is loved and delighted in, it hurts and endangers the lover; and if it may not be loved, why should it be desired? If thou art applauded, it proves the most contagious breath; if thou art vilified, or unkindly used, methinks this should not entice thy love. If thy successful labours, and thy godly friends, seem better to thee than a life with God, it is time for God to take them from thee.

25. Indeed, Lord, my soul itself is in a strait, and what to choose I know not; but thou knowest what to give. "To depart and to be with thee, is far better;" but "to abide in the flesh seems needful." Thou knowest I am not weary of thy work, but of sorrow and siu: I am willing to stay while thou wilt employ me, and despatch the work thou hast put into my hands; but, I beseech thee, stay no longer when this is done; and while I must be here, let me be still amending and ascending; make me still better, and take me at the best. I dare not be so impatient, as to importune thee to cut off my time, and snatch me hence unready; because