Page images
PDF
EPUB

himself. This is the conversation of those that | bosom-friends been. though mutable.

I have long dwelt with in this world: atheism, infidelity, papal church tyranny, bloody wars, destroying the righteous, oppressing the poor, adultery and fornication, stigmatising, perjury, ambition, violence, covetousness, deceit, sottish ignorance, wilfulness in sin, hatred of reproof, revengeful malice. These, and such like, are the fruits of the soil where I have long sojourned, though, through the grace of Christ, among the faithful, there have been better fruits: and is not the company of holy angels better than this? With them God is all; who are even made up of shining wisdom, and holy love, and beneficent activity; who are the blessed choir that melodiously sing forth the high praises of their Maker; among whom God dwells as in his presence-chamber or his temple, and in whom he takes great delight: with these I shall see or hear no evil: no mixture of fools or wicked ones pollute or trouble their society. There will be no false doctrine, no evil example, no favouring wickedness, no accusing goodness, no hurtful violence, but holy, powerful, operative love, will be all and do all, as their very nature, life, and work. Is it not better to be a door-keeper there, than to dwell in the palaces of wickedness? And is not a day with them better than a thousand here ?

With the holy angels I shall love holy souls that are made like unto them, and joined with them in the same society, and it is likely, with them judge, that is, rule the world. All their infirmities are there put off with the flesh; they also are spirits made up of holy life, light, and love. There is none of their former ignorance, error, imprudence, selfishness, contentiousness, impatience, or any other troubling, hurtful thing. When I think with what fervent love to God, to Jesus Christ, and to one another, they will be perfectly united there; alas! how sad and how shameful is it, that they should here be prone to disaffections and divisions, and hardly agree to call each other the servants of God, or to worship God in the same assemblies: but the remnants of dividing principles, viz. pride, error, and uncharitableness, will be all left behind. Society with imperfect saints is sweet: the imperfect image of God upon them is amiable; but their frailties here are so vexatious, that it is hard to live with some of them in peace. But perfect love will make them one, and O how delightful will that communion of saints be! I can never forget how sweet God hath made the course of my pilgrimage, by the fragrance and usefulness of his servants' graces: how sweet have my

How

sweet hath the neighbourhood of the godly been' How sweet hath the holy assemblies been! And how many hours of comfort have I there had! How profitable have their writings, their conference, and their prayers been! What then will it be to live in the union of perfect love with perfect saints in heaven for ever, and with them concordantly to love the God of love?

As the act and the object of love will constitute my felicity, so will my reception from the love of God, and his creatures, be sweeter to me than my own activity can be: for it is mutual love that makes it up. I shall not be the fountain of my own delights; nor can I act till I am acted, nor offer any thing to God, but what I have first received from him. Receive I shall abundantly and continually, and from thence shall overflow to God, and receiving and return. ing, are, now, and will be, the circular endless motion, and our true perpetual life and happiness.

All my receivings shall be from God. His love is not a mere passive will, nor a wish which touches not the object: but it is what heat is in or from the sun or fire. It is an efflux of goodness: it is the most powerful, sweet, communicating principle or work. All love is communicative, but none in comparison of God's: as there is none primitively and simply good but God. How much doth love in the affairs of men? All that is pleasant in the world is it, or its effects. Were it not for sensual love, there would be no generation of man or brutes: God hath made it a generating principle. Hatred causes not congress, but fighting with, or flying from, one another. Were it not for natural love, mothers would never endure the pain, trouble, and care, which is necessary to human birth and education. Were it not for love, parents would never labour all their lives to leave their children well instructed, and well provided for, when they are gone. My food would not please me did I not love it, and I should neglect it to the neglect of my life. Did I not love my books, and learning itself, I should never have bestowed so much of seventy years in poring on them, and searching for knowledge, as I have done. Did I not love my house, my conveniences, and necessaries, I should neglect them, and they would be to me of small use. Did I not love my friends, I should be less profitable to them, and they to me. Did I not love my life, I should neglect it, and never have endured the labour and cost about it as I have done. If a man love not his country, posterity, and the common good, he will be as a

burdensome drone in the hive, or as pernicious vermin. What is done in the world that is good, but by love?

If created love be so necessary, so active, so communicative, how much more will the infinite love of the Creator be? His love is now the life of the world: his love is the life of nature in the living; the life of holiness in saints; and the life of glory in the blessed. In this infinite love it is that I, and all the saints, shall dwell for evermore. If I dwell in love and love in me, surely I shall have its sweet and plenteous communication, and shall ever drink of the rivers of pleasure. It is pleasant to nature to be beloved of others, especially of the great, wise, and good; much more to have all the communications of love, in converse and gifts, in plenty and continuance, which may be still expressing it to our greatest benefit. Had I a friend now that did for me but the hundredth part of what God doth, how dearly should I love him? Think then, think believingly, seriously, constantly, O my soul, what a life thou shalt live for ever in the presence, the face, the bosom of infinite, eternal love. He now shines on me by the sun, and on my soul by the Sun of righteousness, but it is as through a lantern, or the crevices of my darksome habitation: but then he will shine on me and in me openly, and with the fullest streams and beams of love.

God is the same God in heaven and earth, but I shall not be the same man. Here I receive comparatively little, but live in darkness, doubtful and frequent sorrows, because my powers of reception are so small. The windows of my soul are not open to his light, sin hath raised clouds, and consequently storms, against my comforts the entrances to my soul by the straits of flesh and sense are narrow, and they are made narrower by sin than they were by nature. Alas, how often would love have spoken comfortably to me, and I was not at home to be spoken with, but was abroad among a world of vanities; or was not at leisure, or was asleep, and not will ing to be awaked! How often would love have come in and dwelt with me, and I have unkindly shut my doors against him! How often would he have been with me in secret, where he freely would embrace me, but I had some pleasing company or business which I was loth to leave! How often would he have feasted me, and had made all ready, but I was taken up and could not come! Nay, when his table hath been spread before me, Christ, grace, and glory have been offered to me, my appetite hath been gone, or dull, and all hath been almost neglected by me,

and hath scarcely seemed pleasant enough to be accepted, or to call off my mind from luscious poison! How often would he have shone upon me, and I have shut my windows or mine eyes: he was jealous indeed, and liked not a partner! He would have been all to me, if I would have been all for him, but I divided my heart, my thoughts, my love, my desires, and my kindnesses; and alas, how much did go besides him, yea, against him, to his enemies, even when I knew that all was lost, and worse than lost, which was not his? What wonder then if so foolish and unkind a sinner had little pleasure in his love; and if so great ingratitude and neglect of sovereign goodness were punished with such strangeness, fears, and faintings, as I have long with groans lamented?

But in heaven I shall have none of these obstructions. All old unkindness and ingratitude will be forgiven: the great reconciler in whom I am beloved, will then have perfected his work. [I shall then be wholly separated from the vanity which here deceived me: my open soul will be prepared to receive the heavenly influx: with open face I shall behold the open face of glorifying love. I shall joyfully attend his voice, and delightfully relish the celestial provisions! No disease will corrupt my appetite: no sluggishness will make me guilty again of my old neglects. The love of the Father, by the grace of the Son, and the communion of the Holy Spirit, will have got the victory over all my deadness, folly, and disaffection, and my God-displeasing and self-undoing averseness and enmity will be gone for ever. The perfect love which God doth first effect in me, will be my everlasting spring of the fullest love of God. Benevolent love will make me good, that is, a holy lover of God; and then pleased love will make me his delight, and benevolence will still maintain me in my capacity.

Study this heavenly work of love, O my soul, these are not dead or barren studies: these are not sad, unpleasant studies; it is only love that can relish love and understand it. The will here hath its taste, so like to an understanding, as make some philosophers say, that the will perceives' is a proper phrase. What can poor carnal, worldlings know of glorious love, who study it without love? What sounding brass, and tinkling cymbals, a lifeless voice, as they that preach of God, Christ, and heavenly glory, without love? But gazing upon the face of love in Christ, and tasting of its gifts, and looking up to its glorious reign, is the way to kindle the sacred fire in thee.

Look upwards if thou wouldst see the

light that must lead' thee upwards. It is not for nothing that Christ hath taught us to begin our prayers with Our Father which art in heaven :' it is fatherly love that must win our hearts, and that must comfort them: it is in heaven' where this is gloriously manifested. As I said before, as the soul is in all the body, but yet understands not in the hand as it doth in the head, or rejoices not in the foot as it doth in the heart; so God, who is every where, doth not every where glorify his love as he doth it in heaven: thither therefore the mind and eye are even by nature taught to look up as to God, as we look a man in the face when we speak to him, rather than to his feet, though his soul be also there.

My sinful heart hath needed sorrow : my careless, rash, presumptuous soul hath needed fears, and I have had some part of these: mercy saw it good for me, as necessary to prevent my dangerous deceits and lapses. O that in the hour of sensual temptations I had feared more, and departed from evil. But it is holy love that must be my life, or else I am dead notwithstanding fear.

O come then and study the life of love: it is more of a holy nature than of art; but yet study must do much to prepare thee to receive it. This is the great use of a heavenly conversation! It is the contemplation, belief, and hope of the glorious state of love hereafter, that must make us like it, and kindle it in us here: the burning glass must be turned directly to the sun, if you will have it set any thing on fire. There is a carnal or common love to God, which is kindled in men by carnal pleasures; but a holy love, like that in heaven, must be studiously drawn from heaven, and kindled by the foresight of what is there, and what we shall be there for ever: faith must ascend, and look within the vail; thou must not live as a stranger to thy home, to thy God, and Saviour, and thy hopes. The fire that must warm thee is in heaven, and thou must come near it, or open thyself to its influence, if thou wilt feel its powerful efficacy. It is night and winter with carnal minds, when it is day and summer with those that set their faces heaven-ward.

But though all my receivings will be from God, they will not be from him alone: we must live in perfect union also with one another, and with all the heavenly society; and therefore as we must love them all, so shall we be beloved by them all. This will be a subordinate part of our blessedness: God there will make use of second causes, even in communicating his love and glory.

The Lord Jesus Christ will not only be the object of our delightful love, but will also love us with an effectual operative love for ever. His love will be as the vital heat and motion of the heart to all the members, the root of our life and joy. The love of our Redeemer will flow out into us all as the vital spirits, and his face of glory will be the sun of the heavenly Jerusalem, and will shine upon us, and show us God: in his light we shall have light. Did his tears for a dead Lazarus make men say, 'behold how he loved him?' O then what will the reviving beams of heavenly life make us say of that love which fills us with the pleasures of his presence, and turns our souls into joy itself! He comforts us now by the teaching of his word; but surely the fruition of salvation will be more gladdening than the tidings of it. When he that told us of glory in his gospel shall give it us, we shall not only believe, but feel that he loves us.

Believe, O my soul, thy Saviour's love, that thou mayest foretaste it, and be fit to feel it. We were incapable in sinful flesh of seeing him otherwise than as clothed with flesh; and his consolations were administered by a word of promise suitable to his appearance: but when he withdrew his bodily presence, the Comforter was sent with a fuller consolation; but all that was but the earnest and the first fruits of what he will be to us for ever. Be not seldom, nor unbelievingly, nor slight, in the thoughts of thy Saviour's love, for it is he that is the way to the infinite love. Let thy believing be so much of thy daily work, that thou mayest say, that he dwells in thy heart by faith,' and that, while thou livest here it is Christ that liveth in thee; and that thy life in the flesh is not a fleshly life, but by the faith of the Son of God that hath loved thee, and given himself for thee.' That though thou see him not, yet believing, thou lovest him also with unspeakable joy, as believing the unspeakable, perfect joy which his love will communicate to thee for ever.

[ocr errors]

Look upon the sun, and think thus with thyself, How wonderful is the emanation of this sun : its motion, light, and heat communicated to so many millions of creatures all over the earth, and in the seas; what if all these beams of light and heat were proportionable beams of perfect knowledge, love, and joy, and that all creatures that are under the sun had from its influx as much wisdom, love and joy, as they have light, beat, and motion: would not then this earth be as a world of angels and a heaven? O what a blessed world would it be! What a benefactor would the sun be to the world! Why, even such

will Jesus Christ be to the celestial world: he is the Sun of glory; his influence will send forth life, and light, and joyful love upon all the blessed from the face of God, as the sun sends forth from God, its motion, light, and heat upon this world. Now therefore begin and live upon him: live upon the influence of his grace, his teaching, love-kindling, and quickening grace, that thou mayest have his name and mark, that he may find in thee something of himself or of his own, when thou comest to his righteous trial. His grace is not in my power, nor at my command. It is not meet it should be so, but he hath not bid me seek and beg in vain. If he had never told me that he will give it me, it is equal to a promise if he but bid me seek and ask. But I have more! He teaches me to pray; he makes my prayers; he writes me out a prayer-book on my heart; he gives me desires, and he loves to be importuned by them. His Spirit is first a spirit of supplication, and after of consolation, and in both, a spirit of adoption. So far is he from being loth to be troubled with my importunity, that he seeks to me to seek his grace, and is displeased with me that I will ask and have no more.

All this is true. But how then comes my soul to be yet so low, so dark, so fond of this wretched flesh and world, and so backward to go home and dwell with Christ? Alas! a taste of heaven on earth is a mercy too precious to be cast away upon such as have long grieved and quenched the Spirit, and are not by diligent and patient seeking, prepared to receive it. He that proclaims a general peace, will give peace only to the sons of peace. If after such unkind neglects, such wilful sins as I have been guilty of, I should expect to be suddenly in my Saviour's arms, and to be feasted presently with the first-fruits of heaven, I should look that the Most Holy should too little manifest his hatred of my sin. My conscience remembers the follies of my youth, and many a later odious sin; and tells me that if heaven were quite hid from my sight, and I should never have a glimpse of the face of glorious eternal love, it were but just. I look upward from day to day; I groan to see his pleased face, and better to know my God and my home. I cry to him daily, 'My God, this little is better than all the pleasures of sin; my hopes are better than all the possessions of this world; thy gracious looks have often revived me, and thy mercies have been unmeasurable to my soul and body. But O how far short am I of what even fifty years ago I hoped sooner to have attained! Where is the peace that passeth understanding,

that should keep my heart and mind in Christ? O where is the seeing, the longing, the rejoicing, and triumphing faith? Where is that pleasant familiarity above, that should make a thought of Christ and heaven to be sweeter to me than the thoughts of friends, or health, or all the prosperity and pleasure of this world? Do those that dwell in God, and God in them, and have their hearts and conversations in heaven, attain to no more clear and satisfying perceptions of that blessed state, than I have yet attained? Is there no more acquaintance above to be here expected? No more lively sense of future joys, nor sweeter foretaste? No fuller silencing of doubts and fears? I am not so loth to go to a friend, nor to the bed where I often spend the night in restless pains and rolling, as I have too often been to come to thee! Alas, how many of thy servants are less afraid to go to a prison than to their God; and had rather be banished to a land of strangers, than sent to heaven! Lord, must I, that am called thy child, and an heir of heaven, and a co-heir with Christ, have no more acquaintance with my glorified Lord, and no more love to thee that art my portion, before I go hence, and come before thee? Shall I have no more of the heavenly life, light, and love? Alas, I have scarcely enough in my meditations, to denominate them truly heavenly meditations. I have scarcely enough in a prayer to make it indeed a heavenly prayer; or in a sermon to make it a heavenly sermon; and shall I have no more when I come to die? Must I go hence so like a stranger to my home? Wilt thou take strangers into heaven, and know them as thine that do not better know thee here? O my God, vouchsafe a sinner yet more of his Spirit that came down on earth to call up earthly minds to God; and to open heaven to all believers ? O what do I beg for so frequently, so earnestly, for the sake of my Redeemer, as the Spirit of life and consolation, which may show me the pleased face of God, and unite all my affections to my glorified Head, and draw up this dark and drowsy soul to love and long to be with thee.'

But, alas, though these are my daily groans, how little yet do I ascend! I dare not blame the God of love; he is full and willing. I dare not blame my blessed Saviour; he hath showed that he is not backward to do good. I dare not accuse the Holy Spirit, it is his work to sanctify and comfort souls. If I knew no reason of this my low and dark estate, I must needs conclude that it is somewhat in myself. But, alas, my conscience wants not matter to satisfy me of the cause. Sinful resistance of the Spirit, and

unthankful neglects of grace and glory, are un- | make me know my glorified Saviour, my Father, doubtedly the cause. But are they not a cause and my home. It must be a light from heaven that mercy can forgive? That grace can over-that must show me heaven, and a light accomcome? May I not yet hope for such a victory before I die?

'Lord, I will lie at thy doors and groan: I will pour out my moans before thee: I will beg, and whatever thou wilt, do thou with me; thou describest the kindness of the dogs to a Lazarus that lay at a rich man's doors in sores: thou commendest the neighbourly pity of a Samaritan, that took care of a wounded man: thou condemnest those that will not show mercy to the poor and needy: thou biddest us "be merciful as our heavenly Father is merciful." If we see our brother have need of, and shut up the bowels of our compassion from him, it is because thy love dwells not in us. Shall I then wait at thy doors in vain, and go empty away from such a God, when I beg but for that which thou hast commanded me to ask, and without which I cannot serve thee or come to thee, live or die in a habit beseeming a member of Christ, a child of God, and an heir of heaven? O give me the wedding garment without which I shall but dishonour thy bounteous feast: let me wear a livery which becomes thy family, even a child of God. How often hast thou commanded me to rejoice; yea, to rejoice with exceeding and unspeakable joy! How ardently would I in this obey thee! O that I had more faithfully obeyed thee in other preparatory duties, in ruling my senses, my fancy, my tongue, and in diligent using all thy talents! Then I might more easily have obeyed thee in this. Thou knowest, Lord, that love and joy are duties that must have more than a command. O bid me do them with an effecting word. How can I rejoice in death and darkness? When the bridegroom is absent I must fast and mourn while I look towards heaven but through the crevices of this dungeon flesh, my love and joy will be but answerable to my light: how long is it since I hoped that I had been translated from the kingdom of darkness, and delivered from the power of the prince of darkness, and brought into that light which is the entrance of the inheritance of the saints; yet alas, darkness, darkness, is still my misery! There is light round about me, in thy word and works, but darkness is within me. If my eye be dark, the sun will be no sun to me. Alas, my Lord, it is not all the learning in the world, no, not of theology, that consists in the knowledge of words and methods, which I can take for the satisfactory, heavenly light! To know what thou hast written in the sacred book, is not enough to

panied with vital heat, that must turn to love and joy within me. O let me not have only dreaming knowledge, of words and signs, but quickening light, to show the things which these words signify, to my mind and heart. Surely the faith by which we must live, must be a living faith, and must reach further than to words, how true soever. Can faith live in the dark? What is it but an effect of thine illumination? What is my unbelief but the darkness of my soul? Lord Jesus, scatter all these mists: make thy way, O thou Sun of righteousness, into this benighted mind. O send thine advocate to silence every temptation that is against thy truth and thee, and thine agent to prosecute thy cause against thine enemies and mine, and to be the resident witness of thy verity, and my sonship and salvation. Hearing of thee is not satisfactory to me: it must be the presence and operation of thy light and love, shed abroad by thy Spirit on my heart, that must quiet and content my soul. I confess with shame, that I have sinned against heaven and before thee, and am unworthy to have any glimpse or taste of heaven: but so did many that are now entertained and feasted by thy love in glory.

'My Lord, I know that heaven is not far from me: it is not, I believe, one day's or hour's journey to a separated soul: how quick is the communion of my eyes with the sun, that seems far off! Couldst thou not show it me in a moment? Is not faith a seeing grace? It can see the invisible God, the unseen world, the new Jerusalem, the innumerable angels, and the spirits of the perfected just, if it be animated by thine influx; without which it can do nothing, and is nothing; thou that often healedst the blind here in the flesh, didst tell us, that it is much more thy work to illuminate souls: it is but forgiving all my sins, and removing this film that sin hath gathered, and my illuminated soul will see thy glory. I know that the vail of flesh must be also rent before I shall see thee with open face, and know my fellow-citizens above as I am known. It is not heaven on earth that I am begging for, but that I may see it from mount Nebo, and have the bunch of grapes; the pledge, and the first-fruits; that faith and hope which may kindle love and desire, and make me run my race with patience, and live and die in the joy which beseems an heir of heaven.

[ocr errors][merged small]
« PreviousContinue »